Author Archives: usindiamonitor
It’s about time that we updated this hallowed document that has formed the basis for laws, constitutions, and general morality for centuries. Clearly the original one is pointedly outdated. Drafted here are the new (Spray) Tan Commandments in modern America thanks to Pervert Orangutan. Now THIS is the roadmap for how you MAGA.
- Cheat on AND rape your first wife.
- Cheat on your second wife who you met while cheating on your first wife.
- Cheat on your third wife, especially during the childbirth of your son, with a porn star and Playboy bunny, then cover up and lie about the affairs with your mushroom shaped penis.
- Cheat on your taxes, take $415 million from Daddy, and tell your fans that he only gave you $1 million to explain how you lost it all.
- Create a charity and campaign for president just to embezzle even more money.
- Start a fake university and rob millions of dollars from poor people.
- Wherever possible, Grab Them by the Pu$$y.
- Rip off your contractors, hire illegal aliens, and have Daddy buy casino chips to keep your sinking casino afloat.
- Foment racism and white supremacy by claiming America’s first black president and last real president wasn’t born in America.
- Conspire with and aspire to join the league of dick taters.
Truth is stranger than fiction. If we were to write a movie about the Donald Trump criminal empire, one could not hope to do a better job of casting the film than with the real-life goons, perverts, traitors, gangsters, mercenaries, puppet masters, wife-beaters, drunks, pedophiles, fraudsters, shysters, hucksters, con men, hookers, porn stars, madams, gold-diggers, lowlifes, and yes, heroes of the true story.
Every single one of these people is out of central casting. They embody the spirit of this time so well. It would be a marvel to get all of these characters to play themselves. It’s just all so damn perfect exactly as is.
THE GODFATHER. In a virtual graveyard of losers, there is only one winner standing, grinning and shirtless in all this mess, and that is Vladimir Putin. The diabolical puppet master played Obama, Hillary, Donald Trump, the American people, and all the rest of us for fools. Successfully. Donald Trump and his criminal family enterprise will end up going down, yet Putin will remain standing when this is all over, more powerful than before. I’m a bit ashamed to admit I admire the evil genius of this man, who pulled all the strings just so perfectly. Americans will forever disagree on what happened in 2016, and hate each other over it, which is exactly what Putin wanted. Christ, American families have fallen apart over 2016! He wanted to be caught and even left digital footprints on purpose, according to the most intelligent narratives out of the CIA. Well done, Vlad the Impaler!
THE DESERT KINGDOM BUTCHER. A correction is in order. There is a second winner, on Vlad’s coat tails. Saudi Arabia is a fascinating place where I spent some of the best years of my life in childhood. The royal family has for decades managed to ingratiate themselves in the halls of American power, with administrations of both parties, turning off and on the gushing spigots of oil, money, blood, and oil blood money. The brash young Crown Prince Mohammed Bin Salman (MBS) not only purged his own royal family, Shiite clerics, and journalists such as American resident Jamal Khashoggi of the Washington Post; America blessed these actions because he bought and paid for the Trump family, especially Jared Kushner. Not only does the White House remain in omerta over the royal rogue’s butchery; they have amazingly KNOWN ABOUT and SUPPORTED MBS hijinks. How far America has fallen to become a doormat for the mud and blood on the bottom of dictators’ shoes!
THE LAST BOY SCOUT. If you choose to believe in God and that God cares about the fate of America, look no further for evidence- as evidence is appropriately the name of the game in 2019. There is a reason that a portrait of the courageous war hero and law enforcement polymath Robert Mueller hangs on the wall of my office about three feet from my heart during business hours. The slayer of Enron and the Mafia, the guarantor of the Constitution, and the protector of law and order is manifest in one man. Every day in my executive government career I strive to reach the integrity, purpose, discipline, good works, public service, and iron will of the most important man in US government. Against astounding odds and the power of the White House and an entire political party apparatus obstructing him day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, this modern day stoic warrior-poet has lifted the nation’s soul every day toward our better angels. Without uttering a single word. Letting his actions do the talking. With a singularly American hero like Mueller stalking the halls of Washington, embattled in the most important war of our lifetimes, America will have many great days to yet come!
THE BLOND BOMBSHELL. I am a huge fan of Stormy Daniels. Not her “work” in the area of pornography- she is honestly not my type at all- but her legal efforts with Michael Avenatti to help unravel the Cohen-presidential election mischief. Laws were broken, lives were changed, and there must be consequences to pay. Like Mueller, Stormy will come to be seen by history as a hero, though she did sleep with #FatNixon right after his wife gave birth. On that front I assign more blame to him than her- she did it to get on his reality TV show, which is a lie he dangled in front of her. Shocking, this man lies! Including about this affair.
BELTWAY BARBIE BAGHDAD BOB. They say the apple does not fall far from the tree. In the case of Sarah Colonel Huckabilly Sanders, she has inherited all of the aw-shucks bible-humping piss and vinegar of her Daddy, paired with a conscience-free ability to lie to the American people every single day with a straight face. Baghdad Bob himself would be so proud of this dictator’s mouthpiece. I am a mere mortal, with human emotions I cannot deny to my dear reader. I shall drink and dance and revel and debauch myself when this particular traitor goes down!
BAGHDAD BOB BELTWAY BARBIE. Not to be confused with Colonel Sanders, sister-in-crime Kellyanne Conway is a buffoonish cartoon villain straight out of a Disney movie. I have no doubt she goes home at night and slowly burns kittens and puppies in her fireplace. The only thing she has done right is marry a man with a conscience. The ease with which she lies and cheats when presented with inconvenient truths is astounding. No wonder this is the evil woman who coined “alternative facts”!
THE BROKE-ASS FIXER. Once in a while I reflect upon whether to feel sorry for Michael Cohen, Trump’s lead goon on a team full of goons. As Trump’s lawyer and fixer, the man was asked to do some nasty things, which he is at least man enough to own up to. Finally he is telling the truth to the American people about his dirty deeds, done dirt cheap. Yes, this tragic figure is going to jail. This guy looks the part, acts the part, and sounds the part of a New York shylock. No, I don’t feel sorry for you after all you schmuck!
THE EASTERN EUROPEAN FEMBOT. La Femme Melania is straight out of central casting. She escaped from the wrong side of the Iron Curtain only to enable fascist dictatorship here in America. One cannot find a more perfect fit upon scouring this earth. The only thing you need to know about her is that she CHOSE to marry the clown-ostensibly without a gun to her head, but who knows with this crowd. She is the perfect combination of a cynical gold-digger who desperately wants to be seen as a great person, with zero talent. Her means are unconventional at best: she uses her normally idle hands to troll others. Plagiarizing Michelle Obama and throwing her staffer under the bus was her grand introduction to America. Remember “Be Best?” So is she trolling all of us? Trolling her husband? Or “I Don’t Care Do U?” Let me tell you what I don’t care about. I don’t care who she is trolling- it needs to end!
HITLER YOUTH IN A BOTTLE. This just may be the best one of all. Who knew that 2019 America could manufacture such a model? What can possibly be said about Stephen Miller that already hasn’t been? The White House’s resident Neo-Nazi since the departure of Bannon has been plugging away in the bowels of the White House, concocting one racist policy after the other in exchange for a few pats on the head by the boss periodically. Muslim Ban, the Wall, and various other creepy fascist fantasies have been authored in the dark mind of Miller. America can only hope that these ideas will be thrown into the dustbin of history where they belong!
McTURTLENECK. One of the most depressing and disappointing developments of the #PervertOrangutan era is learning that America could descend into dictatorship with the willing assistance of a huge US political party apparatus. The entire GOP just folded in 2016 even as the establishment was railroaded personally and professionally by an authoritarian movement with white male supremacist fantasy at its very core. Mitch, Paul Ryan, and their minions bent over and took it, Rubles, Riyals, and all in order to stay in power, even if staying in power meant turning America into a Russian vassal state!
THE WORST FIRST FAMILY IN US HISTORY. Melanie, as evil as she is, does not even qualify as the worst member of the criminal family enterprise. She doesn’t sip America’s blood off her silver spoon in Trump Tower the way the Trump kids do.
Don, Jr. welcomed Russian help in winning the election with open arms just as his dad was inviting Russia to hack Hillary. Completely lacking a moral center, his only lament from the affair, which blew up this week, is that the Russians brought no dirt on Hillary to the fateful meeting after all following promises of the same. Like Donald, this man is uglier than he thinks he is, a compulsive liar, a spoiled brat, a tool, and a fool. Perfect material for the president’s namesake!
Ivanka plays this dirty game of pretending to care enough about climate change or women’s issues to take away five minutes from her main life’s work, selling third-rate sweatshop slave made apparel at astronomical prices, to talk about these political issues in Vogue magazine. Only for us to find she has no effect on policy whatsoever as her dad proceeds rapaciously to quicken environmental destruction and dismantle women’s health programs. Ivanka is a poorly made up cover front, smiling and dolling up for the magazines and fooling nobody on the right side of things.
None of this is Ivanka’s worst. She brought in yet another prince of darkness, as if there weren’t enough of those little Fauntleroys sitting around already, in the creepy form of her half-baked husband, Jared Kushner. Shockingly, he might be more incompetent and entitled than his siblings-in-law. He repeatedly lies about everything he does, including on national security paperwork. Barely qualified to run a corner ice cream store, the failed real estate magnate-scion wannabe has been given widespread responsibilities encompassing many aspects of domestic and foreign policy, for which he shows zero aptitude or original thought beyond family loyalty. It is a brazen nepotism play that is highly unethical, if barely legal.
Then we have Eric Trump, the wannabe tough guy big game hunter, who uses charity fundraising as a way to make more money for the Trump organization. This is a perfect metaphor for all the Trumps and how they use the organization for self-enrichment and self-aggrandizement. There was one area where the family lacked any clout, the political, and they descended on the carcass of the Republican party like a pack of hyenas. The rest is history! Easily the worst first family ever!
Pervert Orangutan. Could a Hollywood scriptwriter ever come up with this plot and this antagonist? The answer is, not a chance in the world. None of us could possibly have this much imagination. We are at apex and epitome territory. Racist. Sexist. Hooligan. Anti-immigrant. Sexual predator. Con man. Sociopathic liar. Conscience-less and morals-free. Cheater- on business contracts, on marriages, in elections, in debates, and of any type of rule, law, or regulation. With this man, my friends, the presidency has hit true rock bottom. If we go any lower, we will cease to exist as a democracy!
There are so many others. Perhaps we can do a Part 2 in time.
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindiamonitor
One of the worst aspects of the skirmishes going on between India and Pakistan over the last few days has been the severely ugly rhetoric in the media and especially on social media, where commentators and hacks choose to denigrate all of the people of the other country with a broad brush while thumping chests in misplaced nationalism.
Don’t buy the bullshit. As one of the few people on this Earth who has spent time in both Pakistan and India, I can assure you that the common people are strikingly similar to each other. It is the politicians, journalists, and religious figures of each nation- a microscopic minority- who ruin it for the rest of us with their hate and insecurity.
Instead of that noise, focus on this beautiful Pakistani music video, a Coke Studio production which brings together Fareed Ayaz and Abu Muhammad for a gripping classical/pop fusion song that belongs to all humanity and is free on YouTube. I will never forget the day I heard this in Karachi in my friends’ car near the Mazar e Quaid where Jinnah himself lies- and my friend’s wife kindly bought me a copy of the album immediately. Appropriately, Kangna is about a missing bracelet and a poetic and emotional search for it- similar to, say, an Indian Air Force pilot who has thankfully been both lost and found and represents what we hope is a de-escalation of hostilities forever.
Mahanth is Editor of usindiamonitor
Before 2019 the only serious US presidential hopefuls of Indian ancestry in history were unimpressive politicians whose main purpose in life was to hope and pray that you forget that they are even Indian-Americans: Bobby Jindal and Nikki Haley. You can read my fascinating opinions about these drawlin’ Dixieland Republicans Bobby here and Nikki here. Those brown folk failed pretty miserably and unceremoniously on the national stage and deservedly so.
Along comes California Senator Kamala Harris, the next viable candidate for President of the United States. Half-Indian and half-black- a cocktail I like to call “Blindian”- Kamala is largely considered by the mainstream media to be black, like Barack Obama, despite an Indian mom who carried her in the womb for 9 months and seems to have instilled many values in her daughter. Kamala has decided to join the oppressively crowded 2020 race, which promises to feature the most Democratic primary candidates in history. No clear frontrunner has emerged so far, and numerous others expect to throw their hats into the already crowded ring soon.
She certainly isn’t the only minority in the field- we have heard announcements from Joaquin Castro and Corey Booker. Kamala isn’t the only woman either, as Elizabeth Warren, Kirsten Gillibrand and more are in the game. She also isn’t the best known, or the most liberal- Bernie and Elizabeth got her beat on both those counts. She’s youngish, but not the youngest or most youthful. Like many Democrats, usindiamonitor is struggling to decide who to root for this time around- an unprecedented personal phenomenon. I’ve ALWAYS known who I wanted to win in any given presidential race since 1988. Perhaps one factor matters more than any other in 2020 for me and millions of other voters: can the candidate knock Trump far, far out of the White House if he’s still eating cheeseburgers and tweeting in it? We just may need to wait until the debates begin to suss out the question of electability- and hope the left coalesces in unity around the brawler who emerges from the primary alive.
It’s very early, but Kamala just may be that person who survives the gauntlet. I am not firmly on the Kamala Harris Express, but I’m hanging onto the side out the door, like so many commuter train passengers in India. That’s more than I can say for any other candidate. Here’s why.
Electability. At this time it’s a most dangerous game to guess at how voters will act in 2020. In fact, I often lament the sheer length of presidential campaigns that waste our time, money, and attention for over 2 years each cycle- a truly barbarian practice for both candidates and citizenry, when just 3 months would suffice as in most civilized nations. But Americans live (and die) for the horse race, hardly caring to learn about which candidate favors what policies. Many a meal ticket are stamped over these months too in the nests of political operatives, pollsters, journalists like yours truly, hookers, and event managers to name a few. To this atmosphere of Idiocracy reality, Kamala brings a strong combination of intelligence, calm demeanor, attractiveness, elocution skills, optimism, energy, and charisma to excite voters. We have already established she isn’t the candidate who stands out for her race, youth, leftist credentials, name recognition, or gender. She isn’t the frontrunner for big money donors or establishment Democrat support. She isn’t the Senator who has been on the forefront or spotlight in the vanguards of battle. I also believe that she truly fumbled during the Brett Kavanaugh hearings, inflicting no lasting damage on the drunken brute. But if you line her up on each criteria and add up the scores, she would do rather well indeed.
Policy. The first Indian-American Senator in US history grew up in the prosecutorial ranks, eventually climbing up to the role of San Francisco Attorney General and California Attorney General. It’s appropriate that the liberal bastion state and HQ of the Resistance produced Kamala Harris.
The chief criticisms of her record on the left come from her tough reputation for putting criminals away for long periods of time- or “jamming them up” in prosecutors’ parlance. As per the Kamala Harris official website:
Over the course of her nearly two terms in office, Kamala won a $25-billion settlement for California homeowners hit by the foreclosure crisis, defended California’s landmark climate change law, protected the Affordable Care Act, helped win marriage equality for all Californians, and prosecuted transnational gangs that trafficked in guns, drugs, and human beings.
We can add voting rights, childcare expansion, and raising wages to the progressive list of her priorities. As far as bona fides go, that’s pretty good. She is strong on climate change, the existential threat of our time, and healthcare expansion. We have yet to see how well this will all play beyond California though.
Personal History. Like Obama in the 2008 election cycle, Harris is a first-term Senator with a thin record. This has its advantages and disadvantages. A light Senate resume makes it harder for opponents to pin her down and label her for positions taken, while policy wonks like Elizabeth Warren and Sherrod Brown will rightly point to the national battles they have fought that Kamala hasn’t. Kamala doesn’t have as many scars, for better or worse.
Meanwhile, we will find out if Kamala’s status as a married woman will help her or even matter in the modern age. Corey Booker’s distinction as an unmarried bachelor would certainly have damaged his candidacy in any race up till 2016 under endless discussions of “family values,” whatever that means. Not having a spouse or kids should not disqualify a candidate, but voters seem to connect better with those who have an active family life that they can flaunt in magazine features.
In conclusion, the field is crowded and growing. Usindiamonitor does not claim unbridled excitement about any of the candidates yet. But if the election were held today, I’d pull the lever for Kamala Harris. She would make for a good president- measured, calm, capable, and progressive. Kamala represents the future, while many candidates are dug deep in their past. She’ll certainly be better than the current occupier of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, and just maybe the campaign will prove her to be the best of the 2020 parade.
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindiamonitor
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindiamonitor
Decency and integrity are two items which appear to be in short supply in modern America. There is no other way to comprehend how we have a GOP controlled Senate and a Fat Nixon in the White House, one who is far worse than the original Nixon who resigned from office in disgrace in 1974. Fortunately, I believe 2019 will be the year this charade of a shambolic government ends.
The rest of us who possess any modicum of decency and integrity have shown a great deal of disgust and dismay at our current predicament of having a president who is a crook entirely unfit for office. The man has damaged government institutions, raped the environment, grabbed the pussies, enriched himself off the office, emboldened violent lunatics and pea-brained racists, obstructed justice at every turn, damaged America’s standing in the world, ruined the institution of the presidency, and perhaps worst of all, cheated with our enemies to steal the 2016 election.
But mark my words: in a short span of time we will all be thanking our very stars for bringing us Fat Nixon. Bear with me here. Yes, America, we are facing an unprecedented stress test with democracy itself at stake here and around the world. But soon America will show the world, and Fat Nixon’s master Putin the stuff we are made of. There are positive consequences we aren’t thinking about enough yet. Here is why we should be grateful this mess happened:
This is What the Last Gasp of American White Male Supremacy Looks Like. I wrote about this in great detail before Pervert Orangutan won, but here is the gist of it: 2016 brought all of the racist termites in the log of America out into the light, so that we can see what we are dealing with, deal with it, and admit to ourselves how racist America really is- and has been throughout. This is the first step toward progress. Many, myself included, were fooling ourselves by thinking maybe, just maybe, the Obama presidency would usher in a post-racial world. We were optimistically idiotic.
Fortunately for us, we are at the apex of racist thought. Fat Nixon’s downfall will be devastating for the bad guys. As I wrote in 2016, “The white supremacist is today, instead of working to advance himself, educate himself, and acquire the requisite skills that will make him more competitive in the new global environment full of opportunity, watching Fox News and waiting for Donald Trump’s teeny little magic wand to make everything better for him. If Trump loses in November, at least the fantasy of these simple, uninformed people will come to an end for good, and the tandem of Trump and Clinton will have done us all a favor. If Trump wins, the fairy tale reverie will simply continue until the unfulfillable hopes of the white supremacist are much more cruelly dragged along and dashed into the ground. The reckoning comes either way.”
Women Rising: The Fat Nixon administration has turbocharged women to get involved in politics and gain political power. Just look at how women, many without rich donors, powerful families, or political experience wiped so many good old GOP boys off the map in November 2018. The 2018 class looks like Rush Limbo’s worst nightmare! Women of color. Women of different religions. Native women. Lesbian and transgender women. The current Congress represents America at a much more granular level than the presidential races, which for centuries depended on an outdated, nonsensical, and corrupt electoral college system and antiquated ideas such as superdelegates. There are more women in Congress than ever before. This is awesome news.
Many conservative Neanderthals lament the ascension of women toward power careers and political muscle. What is wrong with you people? Let’s do a quick survey of why women MUST be in the halls of American power:
- Women rape, molest, or sexually harass people less than men, including at the workplace
- Women get into bar fights less than men
- Women shoot and stab people less than men
- Women start less wars than men
- Women are less likely to be terrorists or Neo-Nazis than men
- Women are less likely to be addicted to alcohol or drugs than men
- Women are less likely to drink and drive than men
- Women are more likely to find solutions using empathy than men
- Women GIVE BIRTH, among the most difficult challenges faced by our species.
This isn’t just about the apex of power, such as in Congress. It’s about the soccer moms and grandmas and middle school girls who are knocking on doors to support political campaigns, and the Women’s Marches, and the housewives running for school board or County Treasurer for the first time. It’s about black women becoming judges in droves in Kentucky and Texas for the first time- shaping jurisprudence in those areas for decades to come.
The jewel in the good guys’ crown (and thorn in Fat Nixon’s side) is Nancy Pelosi, who I believe will become president by default in 2019 after Fat Nixon and his lunatic bible humping lapdog Pence are taken down. Sorry Hillary, Kamala, Tulsi and Elizabeth: Nancy will beat you all there without even running for it.
Minority Report. I mentioned a whole lot of diversity when it comes to women. But there’s diversity of all types on the up and up thanks to Fat Nixon. Comedians like Hasan Minhaj and Aziz Ansari, who are Indian Muslims, are thriving in the age of Pervert Orangutan, partly by beating the crap out of him with humor and raising awareness of their backgrounds as a mechanism to enlighten and entertain. Pro athletes such as LeBron James are way beyond woke right now, and using their influence to do good while epically taking down the president. They aren’t shying away from political conversations. We are seeing the Deep South, of all places, cultivate powerhouse black politicians like Andrew Gillum and Stacey Abrams in towns where Scarlett O’Hara’s ghost still roams from ball to ball with her house slaves in tow. And someone like Kamala Harris, a most unlikely presidential hopeful, now seems like a top tier candidate as an antidote specifically to the historic trash heap of Fat Nixon.
The High School Revolution. High school kids are more woke than at any time in the last four decades. Some of them are putting down their Pokemon Go long enough to march in the thousands hand in hand with the Parkland students, who are my heroes. Young people are engaged and energized, and there is no question that they are animated by the corruption they see projected by Fat Nixon and his goons.
Of course, this cuts both ways. Dipshits like the smirking Nathan Phillips and his classless Covington High Kavanaughs seem to be feeling frisky these days with their boy in the White House too. But that’s better than the apathy that has defined generations of high school kids when it came to politics. Whether it’s for love or hate, the 16 year olds seem to have a fire lit under them.
Cities and States Step to the Plate. I say this more as a citizen than as a City government official: the resistance has resulted in awesome leadership by mayors and governors, and the cities and states they represent. Look at how New York state shut down the corrupt Trump Foundation and is giving the Trump spawn’s finances a long-overdue colonoscopy. California state has created a blueprint for our environmental future, and will be Ground Zero for the new “Green New Deal” which is coming. Over 400 mayors have signed on to a pledge to battle climate change together with electric vehicles. When the federal government is deadlocked and led by an autocrat, the other wheels of democracy can still turn.
The Only Wall Going Up will be Around the Presidency. Both Democrats and Republicans are guilty of letting president run amok, and some serious guardrails are called for. Presidential power has been swelling beyond the levels anticipated by the founders of the United States of America. Nobody thinks of the judicial and legislative branches as co-equal anymore. That’s because their power has been steadily eroded over time in relation to the executive branch. The White House has too much power to commit acts of war, acts of treason, or unilaterally dismantle the will of Congress and the people on specific policies.
Here are just a few recent examples of executive over-reach:
- Fat Nixon has refused to administer sanctions against Russia for months after Congress had voted to implement them- simply to protect himself. This should be part of the articles of impeachment in itself.
- The threat to declare a national emergency to fund a border wall, which has nothing to do with any sort of emergency, while deploying 10,000 troops there over the holidays, using specious arguments
- Brett Kavanaugh corruptly embedding himself in the White House for days of confirmation fight drama as a judicial nominee, as if he was an executive branch employee
- Three consecutive administrations (W. Bush, Obama, and Fat Nixon) have decided that extra-judicial assassinations, often resulting in civilian collateral damage, can take place by remotely piloted drones anywhere in the world the president pleases.
- Fat Nixon on one hand decides to bomb Syria, and on the other hand decides to withdraw from Syria, without any Congressional debate or a national conversation. The American people should NEVER allow these decisions to be made unilaterally.
Too many of the guard rails around the presidency are currently “norms” rather than “laws.” That needs to change. The good news is, change is coming in this area, and it will protect both conservatives and liberals from being subject to a wannabe dictator again- so that Fat Nixon will be the last of his kind.
Presidential candidates must release their tax returns or drop off the ballot, by law. The emoluments clauses around the presidency must be beefed up so that a president’s business interests around the world may no longer subjugate America’s national security for Rubles or Riyals. Nepotism laws should be strengthened so that a president’s daughter and son-in-law can never again receive a security clearance so obviously at the nation’s peril. Cabinet Secretaries should be immediately terminated for $50,000 desks or use of a government plane for vacation. Executive orders and other forms of unilateral action that can harm the country must be shut down once and for all. It’s not about benefitting Democrats or Republicans, but strengthening our democracy.
Rejoice, Americans. We have witnessed a dark period indeed in US history, and at times I lament my fate in having to see kids in cages, separated from their parents in response to racist fears and cruel hearts, all paid for with my hard earned tax deductions. The dark period will soon come to an end, and from what we can see so far, what comes next shall be glorious.
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindiamonitor
With so many serious things going on in the world today I thought it was time to cover something on the lighter, more brainless side. For some years I have thought that certain Bollywood actors and Hollywood actors look remarkably similar to one another. In this column you will find the ones I consider to be the TOP 5 dopplegangers in #BollywoodHollywood. While I am NOT the first to make up any of these connections, this top 5 ranking is brought to you by usindiamonitor.
How awesome would it be if these guys actually met and we could see pictures of them shoulder to shoulder?
5) SAIF ALI KHAN & CHARLIE DAY. I’m not sure that either actor would appreciate being compared with the other on looks. After all, Charlie Day is a pure slapstick comedian who gets pushed around and ruthlessly made fun of in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia or movies he appears in. Meanwhile Khan has attempted to be a serious actor, landing parts such as in Netflix’s Sacred Games where he is an unsmiling, brooding cop. No matter. These guys look so eerily similar, when I did image searches of one I wondered whether it was the other.
4) KATRINA KAIF & COBIE SMULDERS. By no coincidence, I have a huge crush on both of these ladies. They are most notably different in skin tone, but otherwise they could practically be sisters. Why are my hands shaking as I type this???
3) HRITHIK ROSHAN & BRADLEY COOPER. Shout out to my fellow Georgetown alum Bradley Cooper, who has some smarts and even singing chops to go along with those good looks and awesome acting. There can be no question that Hrithik is just as much of a heartthrob for Indian women everywhere. My Indian bias notwithstanding, I think Hrithik wins by a… hair.
2) PARIS HILTON & KAREENA KAPOOR. This unlikely pair have similar features through and through. Their sultry lips are practically interchangeable. The resemblance is undeniable, which gets these ladies into the #2 spot. I really do wonder what Kareena thinks about this…
- AAMIR KHAN & TOM HANKS. I think it’s only fair that the top honors should go to the best actors in the entire group. Aamir is easily the best Bollywood actor on this list with a long and illustrious career. Not to be outdone, Tom Hanks has been killing it in Hollywood for many decades as well.
Many American soldiers served and died in the various bloody theaters of World War II. They were called upon by the people of America and the wider family of civilized nations around the world to defeat burgeoning, horrific threats to the global order. They enjoined what history has widely judged to be a just and necessary war. Hundreds of thousands of these heroes’ remains were duly brought back home to be buried by their families and friends in somber funeral ceremonies across the 50 states. While those war dead represented the greatest possible sacrifice to country at a critical moment in history, and also a tragic loss for countless communities, at least upon paying the terrible price they received the proper honor they deserved in a final resting place chosen by those who loved them the most after earning victory. In the 1940s and beyond their headstones would be adorned with inspiring inscriptions, soaring monuments, and beautiful flowers, or they could lie next to their brothers in arms in dignified venues such as Arlington Cemetery, their heroism to be cherished by the generations to come and most importantly, never, ever forgotten.
Yet the remains of too many of these brave souls unceremoniously languish even today under remote corners of Indian stone and soil, in the incongruously scenic mountains and fields of Arunachal Pradesh, a Northeastern state riven by contentious territorial disputes between the rising superpowers, China and India.
They were US Airmen whose planes crashed in the heat of battle, and the Great War is still not over for them at all. We have a good idea of exactly who they are and where they lie, but the descendants and friends of approximately 400 men have been innocent victims squarely caught in the crossfire of endless bureaucratic disputes between nations- *nations whose soldiers fought alongside them as allies in WW II, no less.* Government bureaucracies are preventing even basic access to the sites where these men lie, forever young. Meanwhile, challenging and complex as the solutions may be, the United States government has not fought hard enough for a clean resolution, which should disturb all Americans who still benefit from the fruits of the MIA soldiers’ ultimate sacrifice.
As an Indian-American in particular, I feel the pain and helplessness suffered by the wives, siblings, and children who are living and over time, dying without the simple satisfaction of closure that society owes them.
What will it take to right this injustice? Previous editorials in this space by Gary Zaetz, the leader of Families and Supporters of America’s Arunachal Missing in Action paint a picture of tireless efforts, promising breakthroughs, productive archaeological surveys and digging expeditions, and minor victories on the rare occasion where a limited expedition turns up a small fraction of a soldier’s strewn body parts over 70 years after World War II ended.
The Pentagon has even sponsored a few ceremonies for a few of them. Many journalists, government leaders, and concerned citizens around the world have encouragingly offered support for the cause. But what sticks out most cruelly are the reams of red tape thrown forward by the halls of power in Washington, New Delhi, and Beijing which are stifling progress. Please read these moving editorials by Gary Zaetz here with critical updates to the story published here and here. Please take a few moments to scan the photos of the pilots and crew members, and look straight into the eyes of these young men and their families.
So what are the main challenges today? The key roadblock is the fact that China and India disagree about who the land belongs to, along with thousands of other miles of far-flung border lands throughout the Himalayan Mountain region. The two nations themselves have fought major wars in the 20th century over various little pieces of this turf in tragic pissing matches, with China defeating India badly, along with numerous smaller skirmishes that continue to this day. None of these have served to permanently settle the disputes over territory between these two nuclear weapon-tipped rivals. Hundreds of thousands of troops from both sides uneasily patrol the disputed regions in an ugly stalemate. The United Nations and the international community have been helpless in helping settle the disputes. Under the current postures of the involved nations, China will not allow peaceful expeditions to search for the remains safely behind a security cordon. India, viewing its role in the matter as subservient to wider engagement priorities in dialogue with China, has been unwilling to support the expeditions despite claiming outright that the territory is Indian. Perhaps understandably under the harsh realities, neither China nor India have decided to lead the discovery of American bodies. More vexingly, successive United States governments under administration after administration both Democrat and Republican have not taken full accountability for their own war dead either.
This should not stand. In fact, there is a duly appointed Pentagon office called Defense POW/MIA Accounting Agency (DPAA) whose entire mission and reason for being is to find, recover, and repatriate the US military’s MIAs around the world. Unlike MIAs in Vietnam and elsewhere, where it may seem like finding them is sort of a “cold case,” there is more accurate information as to where to look in the case of Arunachal’s MIA soldiers. However, since 2004 communications and efforts of the Families and Supporters for Arunachal’s Missing in Action with the DPAA has resulted in limited progress.
The group has also earnestly reached out to US Senators, Representatives, State Department officials such as multiple US Ambassadors to India over time, senior Indian government officials such as retired Indian military officers, the Chinese Embassy in Washington, media groups, and others. Unfortunately, these communications have largely resulted in finger pointing about who is responsible for the lack of accountability in leading the long-overdue MIA discoveries. Over the last several years I have felt increasingly hapless due to the sea of red tape that has risen up.
We can certainly do better! I have contemplated what simple actions can be taken by concerned readers, regardless of where you live in the world, your politics, culture, or your religious background in the face of what seem like insurmountable challenges as large as the Himalaya mountains themselves. After all, this is purely a humanitarian issue with a potential solution in sight, a light at the end of the tunnel. You can join in by doing the following:
1) Join the Facebook page for the latest updates and offer your support in any way you can to this nonprofit organization, including financial.
2) Reach out with targeted messaging to the relevant government authorities individually, or as part of an organization you belong to such as local VFW or American Legion posts. Feel free to use the content from this editorial or others we have shared here as a guide, such as copying and pasting into emails, letters, or social media:
* The US Embassy to India https://in.usembassy.gov/embassy-consulates/new-delhi/
* The Indian Embassy to the United States https://www.indianembassy.org/
* The White House https://www.whitehouse.gov/
* Your Senator and Congressperson
3) Publish these letters and emails in local newspapers, newsletters, or social media outlets that you have access to.
4) If you can, set up meetings with government leaders who may have the power to assist in finding and bringing home the MIAs of Arunachal Pradesh.
5) Communicate any fresh ideas you might have to usindiamonitor or to Gary Zaetz, as you may think of new angles not yet considered for achieving elusive progress.
If enough people join this fight, the Arunachal Pradesh expeditions can continue apace once again with the approvals of all the relevant authorities- a long and hard slog in its own right so far led by a team including Clayton Kuhles, despite the government resistance. Indian-Americans, other NRIs, or Indians residing in India itself can join with this cause in solidarity. But of course, all comers would be most welcome.
The saddest aspect is that the loved ones of the US war dead will themselves be buried without the satisfaction of burying their own hero family members. This suffering is unnecessary and unacceptable, if there is something that can be done about it.
To some I understand that this may all appear to be such a small and unimportant priority from a long bygone era, when there are so many active problems going on in the world of today. To those, I would respond that if we patriots can’t take care of these little things as a society, then how can we possibly hope to tackle the grand global challenges society faces today?
I look forward to hearing from you on this conundrum.
Unlike most of you, I was born in a dictatorship country, and spent some additional formative childhood years in a different dictatorship country in a different region of the world – a far crueler monarchy at the time. Which particular countries they happen to be, or how good life was for me or my family in either are irrelevant.
I learned at a young age not only the positive aspects of absolute strongman power, of which there are a few, but also the darker sides- like not having free speech in public, in newspapers, or on TV; having your religious trinkets thrown into the garbage by airport security; watching religious police roam the roads with canes, free to beat any man, woman, or child they wanted, whenever they wanted, legally, gleefully, out in the open.
I bring up these childhood memories for only one reason: to ring a loud Code Red Alarm Bell for all of you Americans out there who have never lived under a dictatorship or studied one. Wake up. The transition is happening right now, in 2018, before our very eyes.
Also unlike most of you, I also took an oath of loyalty to the United States at age 9. As an American by choice, this is an especially confusing time.
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindamonitor
While browsing the quite engaging war scenarios by the Infographics Show, I came across a video that describes in advanced level of detail what could happen if a potential US-India alliance came to battle a Russia-China offensive. This video is relevant for several reasons. Most importantly, many have come to believe that these two sides present the front lines of the new 21st century “Cold War,” which needs to be recognized as a new world order slowly replacing the previous Cold War and its unstable aftermath we are living through today. This is in fact even the topic of an upcoming novel by usindiamonitor. Secondly, the world needs to prepare for these new alignments.
Is this terrible war scenario likely in the near future? We don’t think so. But we foreign policy mavens should get mentally prepared for what it would look like, and this video does a very good job of laying out the likeliest possibilities in the heat of a battle involving millions of soldiers and affecting billions of human beings. It’s worth watching! If nothing else, you will learn what the capabilities are of these four powerful militaries when thrown onto the chessboard in a time of grave peril.
Mahanth S. Joishy is Editor of usindiamonitor
For close to 25 years Tool has been considered one of the mightiest bands in the rock music universe. Rightly so- who else better encapsulates the intellectual lyrics, the genius mathematical precision, the mesmerizing vocals, heavy personal journeys, punishing drum solos, guitar riffs and bass lines, the deeply spiritual and even religious overtones with genre-bending orchestration?
Nobody, that’s who.
In a previous post about the best Western music ever inspired with Indian influences, unsurprisingly Tool made the top 5 list of Indo-American fusion songs of all time with Right in Two, a song about humanity’s own predictable demise.
Separately, we have talked about the blistering hot hard rock/ metal scene which is taking hold in India, especially among young people. Some ferocious bands who have mixed metal with Hindu religious influences in the last few decades deserve to be heard around the world.
Today I would like to introduce you to another little pleasure bomb: an engaging acoustic cover song recorded live by talented Indian dudes of the aforementioned song, “Right in Two.” This is a homage within a homage, as an Indian band covers an American band that deftly utilizes India’s ageless somnambulance perfectly back in America for the whole world to enjoy.
And what better way than with a tight video by Beard of Harmony & Yann Phayphet where you can see an Indian neighborhood and hear Indian background noises like nowhere else in the world?
CAN YOU DIG IT: